Contemporary Stories- Dealing with Adversity
Nordic Experts
I have been a member of this health club downtown
for about ten, maybe twelve years, discounting the nineties.
However, before it was even “born” I used to
enjoy the pool and the sauna of the Bucharest hotel, as far back as 1995.
When it opened under a new, Swedish banner, I thought
that this would be so much better, that it will feel like…well, Sweden.
Only it did not!
Yes, they had a Nordic manager, apparently the
sun of the owner.
He was so helpless, it almost invited a
disgruntled customer, such as the undersigned to feel sorry for him.
A small Jacuzzi indoors failed to function.
In fact, for weeks it has been surrounded by…construction
panels no less.
When this fixing operation took forever, I went
in to ask the super skilled specialist, brought in from the Nordic paradise to
teach the natives what is what:
Look, it is taking forever
We miss a part
Well, what about DHL, UPS and the rest?
…
They will bring anything in a matter of a
couple of days, if it is coming from Papua New Guinea…
I think he responded with some nonsense here
To top the aforementioned problem, one of the
two saunas did not work and the other seemed overflowing at all times
Clients had to wait outside to use it or just
forget about it and go home because…
Employees were inside, occupying the few
places!!
Can you beat that?!
When I went to the Big Expert from the Fjords,
he said:
Yes, we have a policy
Customers do not have space in the sauna
We allow our staff to use the sauna and
facilities
However, we cannot use it anymore
It is for off peak hours
Yeah, right, as if they look at the watch and
say…oh, I cannot do it now
That “manager „was so useless and annoying that
he even kept an aquarium in his window at the first floor.
Everybody could see it from the pool and enjoy
the horror…
There were no visible fish.
That is because the water had not been changed
in – who knows- maybe sixteen months (?)
For me, that was the epitome of lousy, arrogant,
stupid management:
Consider this:
This man could summon a janitor to clean that
shitty thing
He could also place it under the desk, in order
to save his customers the pleasure of seeing a bowl of dirt, right there, above
their heads, as a symbol of the “cleanliness of his operation”.
Finally, he should have given up on a recipient
with dead fish, since he obviously did not care a hoot about them.
The next “management guru” to arrive from the
civilized and advanced North in order to share with the barbarians his
knowledge was in the same mold.
The fact that he was –probably still is- gay,
did not import on his abilities, in fact, knowing his orientation I expected
more.
Alas, I was again gravely disappointed.
He was superior and distant- which is the
manner of most of the Nordics I have met, in fact, I am even thinking of the
protagonist of last year’s smash hit- The Square.
I will only mention this:
At one point, when sitting on one of the three
reed armchairs they had had around the pool, I noticed a foul smell.
-
What the hell is that?
Sniffing around I was relieved to find it was
not some fingers on my foot, about to fall off and putrefy the air before doing
so…
It was the reef chair, putrid and smelling like
a corpse…well, maybe I am exaggerating…a little bit
When I told Manager Number 2 from the
Exquisite, Formidable, Outstanding and Glorious Sweden…
We will change the furniture, with the same
smug attitude, like he was somehow a paid customer in my shop and I attacked
him with some fetid, foul instrument or couch
You think he changed the rotten things?
Like hell he did, he just had them intoxicating
the clients for some more months and only then did he decide to throw the garbage
away…without any replacements.
Armand Asante
